The Truth About Jesus

Jesus was a socialist Jew from England (see William Blake), who didn't live over two thousand years ago. He was featured as a Mary Sue character in a shitty Jewish slashfic called The Bible, even though all he did was troll on ppl IRL, and eventually got killed for pissing everybody off. He had many fanbois over the years, and was the inspiration for the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, and the Holocaust. Jesus is also personally responsible for every sports championship ever. Regardless of his existence or no, he proved to be the greatest troll to ever grace the presence of Jews, Muslims, Scientologists, Gaytheists and Fagnostics.

He was also a negro, and was in the black power.



He was also a lion!



Now this is a story all about how my Life got flipped turned upside down And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there I'll tell you how I become the prince of a town called Bethlehem In west Jerusalem born and raised On the playground is where I spent most of my days Chillin' out, maxin', relaxin', all cool And all converting some Hebrews outside of the school When a couple of guys they were up to no good They tried to nail me to a cross of wood. I got in one little fight and my mom got scared And said, "You're going on a 26 year absence somewhere” I whistled for a cab and when it came near The license plate said God and it had dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo home to God's heir!" I pulled up to the temple about 7 or 8 And I yelled to the cabby yo holmes smell ya later Looked at my kingdom I was finally used To sit on my throne as the prince of the Jews.